A Public Applogy

Home is swell. There's not a lot to do, which I have just gotten used to. How did I keep myself entertained when I lived here? I have no idea.

Mom and I went to the mall today. I completed my interview outfit. After the mall we went to dinner with two of their friends. I always forget how good Doubleday's is. Sometimes I really feel connected to my parents, and I know that I belong to them. Other times, not so much. Living away from them has let me get to know them better. I think I like it.

I need to come clean, although I'm sure none of what I'm about to type is no shocker to anyone who has been in contact with me over the past few weeks. I am scared. I am a wreck all of the time because of this LA thing. Do I want to go? Yes, I think I do. What am I so worried about? I just want people to like me. I've been fragile lately. I walk around at any moment ready to burst into tears, and I am constantly sick to my stomach. I'm not exactly sure what is making me this way--I usually can handle stress.

Now I need to apologize to everyone who has dealt with me lately. If I have been snappy, please understand that it is not you. If I have gotten emotional over something insignificant, if I have been rude, if I have ignored a call or ditched plans, I am very very truly sorry. I also need to thank anyone who has listened to me lately. I'm sure it gets old listening to me complain about getting to leave Ohio to hang out in California. I'll get over it, no need to worry about me.

countdown: 5 days